I love you now. Still....

 I can’t bring myself to say “I loved you.” That phrase rings too final, too complete, as if my love for you were confined to some past that no longer exists. But it does exist—more vividly than ever, woven into every moment of my life. My love is not a closed chapter, not something that faded away when you did. It didn’t end. It simply became something else.

I love you now. Still.

You left, but this love stayed, refusing to leave just because you’re gone. It lingers like a shadow that never loses sight of me, binding me to you in ways I never anticipated. Some days, it’s quiet, a soft hum beneath my daily routine. Other days, it explodes to the surface, catches me off guard—raw, fierce, like a reminder that my heart still remembers every detail of what we shared.

Some days, it feels like this love is my only anchor, giving me strength to rise, urging me forward. And then there are days when it’s a challenge, a test of endurance. A dare to keep going, to honor you with each step I take, even when the weight of it feels too much.

But mostly, it’s this presence within me, woven into every breath I take, every decision, every pause, and every flicker of memory. It’s there in every forward glance and every backward look, in the quiet solitude of night when I close my eyes and find you, still.

There’s no distance far enough, no goodbye final enough, to make this love waver. It isn’t dependent on you being here. It simply is, vast and unbroken, echoing through the silence you left behind.

So no, I won’t say, “I loved you.” Because it’s not past tense. You haven’t taken it with you. It’s here with me, steady and unyielding. And I know I’ll carry it with me always.

Because I love you.

Still.